A natural and unaffected person should be adorned with virtues, just like a precious gem, if it is without adornment, should be valuable.
But if a person pays attention, they will see that in terms of praise and recommendation, it is the same as in acquiring and gaining: because the saying says it well: Small gains fill the bag; because small gains come often, and large ones only here and there.
Therefore, it is true that small things earn great praise because they are constantly mentioned and noticed, while opportunity for any great virtue is as rare as major holidays.
Therefore, good manners significantly contribute to a person’s reputation and they are (as Queen Isabella said) like a constant written recommendation.
In order for a person to acquire good manners, it is enough not to devalue them because they will be noticed by others in that way, and for the rest, they should rely on themselves.
Because if they try too hard to show them, they will lose their dignity, and that means naturalness and unaffectedness.
The behavior of some is similar to a poem in which each syllable is counted; how can How can a person understand big things if their mind is accustomed to dealing with trivial matters?
Not caring about formal behavior at all means teaching others not to care about it, and therefore diminishing respect for oneself. Especially when it comes to strangers and those prone to formalities, it should not be neglected. However, dwelling on it and elevating it to the heavens is not only tiresome, but also diminishes trust and reputation for those who strive for it.
There is an effective and impressive way of polite behavior that is particularly useful if one knows how to strike the right tone.
Among equals, a person is confident in intimacy, so it is good to be somewhat dignified. Among those lower than oneself, a person is confident in respect, so it is good to be somewhat familiar.
Anyone who exaggerates in anything, thereby giving others the opportunity to become tired of them, harms their reputation.
Adapting to others is good, as long as it is seen that a person does it out of respect, not out of convenience.
Generally speaking, it is good advice to support others, but this should not be blindly followed, as it It is necessary to add something of your own: if you confirm someone’s opinion, add your own viewpoint to it; if you follow someone’s suggestion, let it be with a condition; if you allow someone’s advice, let it be accompanied by further arguments.
People should be careful with excessive politeness; because, no matter how capable they otherwise are, envious people will certainly accuse them of flattery, at the expense of their greater virtues.
Similarly, it is a loss in business if a person is overly considerate or too careful about timing and opportunity.
Salomon says: He who thinks of the wind will not sow, and he who looks at the clouds will not reap. A wise person will create more opportunities than they find. Human behavior should be like clothing, it should not be too tight or elegant, but rather such that one can work and move freely in it.